And the truth shall set you free...
This week has been filled with lessons on acceptance. Facing the truth can be a bit scary especially when it hurts you or the people you love. But in a great paradox, the truth hurts now but heals in the long term.
I have learned that to tell the truth, doesn't even have to constitute a lie. There are just things that we don't want admit to ourselves, things we deny. Facing the truth about ourselves can be tough. And yet being true is the only way to be truly free.
Last night, spent quality time with good friends from University... There were good news and some not-so-good. After 20 years, a guy friend who was celebrating his birthday shares he has finally told his mum he is gay. He is about to celebrate 10 years of relationship with his partner in life. He says he feels free, and I believe his mum who has been in denial feels the same way.
Another couple whom I deeply admire admits that their son has signs of autism. It breaks their heart to be confronted with the truth because they had great plans for their child as any good parent wanting the best for their kids. Now, they are not sure as to what life holds for him but they are bravely facing this piece of truth by seeking therapy for their kid and managing their fears. My friend recounts of other mums faced in similar situations who found it difficult to accept, taking some years before they came into therapy when their children were much older, when the problem was much harder to manage.
Indeed, how many times have we learned that the longer we deny a problem, the worse it becomes. And science proves to us that early detection provides the best cure. If faced head-on, the matter is easier solved. It is true, I guess, that the faster you can accept something, the faster you can move on. But I also know that it takes courage. I have to admit I easily fall into the trap of denying because I am afraid to get hurt and so I don't face it, but I die a little each day...
Today, I walked behind a young woman who was blind finding her way with a crane. I wanted to hold her hand. I wondered at what point she had accepted the truth about herself. Did she feel pain, did she feel bad, did she feel it was unfair? When did she embrace reality no matter how hard and started living life as best as she knew she could.
And then I looked back, and saw how truly blessed most people are , we who can read and write and afforded the opportunities we so easily take for granted, like seeing where we are going. In fact, we have everything we really need -- a body that is healthy enough to do the tasks required of us, a mind whose thoughts can change the world, a heart that loves...
And all we need to do is to accept what we can do, to be true. To accept the truth.
Truth is a range, it can be as deep as accepting that your parent is dying, the relationship is not working or you are not happy with your job, and as simple as accepting that he or she is not just into you...
Yet faced at the first signs, makes it easy to solve, to let go, and to move on. Sometimes, acceptance is enough. And we can begin to truly live. Tell the truth, in order to be free.
May love save the empty...
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Dearest God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things that we can and the wisdom to know the difference.
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